She was ashamed to admit it but she knew she just had to come out of the trap she created for herself if she wanted to be free.
She was leading a secret life as a gambler.
What made it so hard for her to confess was the fact that she wasn’t some high stakes roller who spent thousands in casinos and checked in high-class reno hotels.
She was a mom who managed the family budget for groceries, rent and the children’s tuition. She was ashamed because she almost jeopardized her family’s life just to satisfy her addiction.
After losing thousands of dollars in a gambling flop, she finally realized she was going on a downward spiral and she needed to stop before she hit rock bottom.
I was reading Oprah’s archives when I stumbled on this mom’s story. It made me think how many people actually lead secret lives and trap themselves in their mistakes
Whether it’s a little secret, a deep-seated addiction or a horrific skeleton hidden in the closet, all of us have done some things we surely can’t be proud of. We’ve all had those moments when all we can say to ourselves is “Why did I hell did I do that?”
During my “dark ages,” I used to beat myself up over mistakes I’ve made and wallowed over what I should have done. Then it was much easier to deal with the shoulda-woulda-coulda’s than to forgive myself and move on.
But then I saw the trap I was setting up for myself. And I knew that if I wanted to come out, I was the only one who can set myself free.
As Oprah put it, “You are not your mistake, you made a mistake.” And there’s a whole world of difference between the two.
When I came to accept that I was imperfect and my mistakes do not sum up who I am, I found peace with my past and shut the door behind me.
There was no turning back, I looked forward and walked into freedom.
Do you need to come out of a self-created trap?