Fighting the flab
Warning: this is a very vain post.Â
After a month of doing Bikram Yoga, I finally got bored and decided I needed a new workout. So I dug up my old boxing gloves and headed for the gym.
I have been going for the past week and I have to admit it hasn’t been easy. Waking up early in the morning when you’ve had a late night taking care of the baby is a real tough challenge. It’s a good thing hubby has been patiently waking me up and encouraging me to move along.
I know exercise is supposed to pump up your endorphins and get you in a happy mood.
For the past days though, I’ve been feeling a bit down.
I have a confession to make: I’m still having issues with my body.
It frustrates me how slow my progress is and how fast our wedding date is arriving.
I don’t mind the marks on my body. I don’t like them and I do wish I could get rid of these damn stretch marks but I’m slowly accepting the fact that they are part of motherhood. I rather see them as battle scars to prove that I can make it through a tough journey.
The flabs are the ones that really get to me.
I’ve never had flabs.
I was born thin and blessed with a fast metabolism. I could eat anything I want and not gain weight. I could wear practically anything I wanted without having to worry if my arms look huge or if my stomach bulges out.
I had a relatively healthy body image.
When I reached a point that I really needed to slim down a bit, I just popped some herbal pills and I was all good.
I think what really frustrates me now is the fact that I never had to work this hard to shape up.
I never had to look in my closet and get frustrated at all the clothes I couldn’t wear.
I never had to hear people saying, “Tumaba ka. (You got fat.)”
Sometimes I feel like putting a sign on my stomach saying “Don’t tell me. Just delivered baby six months ago and trying to get back in shape.” (And telling me that I got fat is not helping at all!)
My friends would attest that I’m one of the most positive people around. Before, I can get by aching muscles, bleeding knuckles and crumbling knees in a breeze. But right now, I don’t want to pretend that I’m feeling okay because I’m not.
One thing I learned from years of “suppressing feelings”: if you want to get over it, let it go.
So there, I’ve said it.
Tomorrow, I’ll feel better and hit the gym even harder.
This entry was posted on Wednesday, October 17th, 2007 at 5:14 am and is filed under Fit and fabulous. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.












ris (25 comments.) October 18th, 2007 at 1:40 am
haha.. i feel for you jayme. bakit kailangan pa that women’s bodies change after giving birth?
so sabi ko nga sarili ko, if all else fails, magd-drugs nalang ako! hehehe
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